danmccracken

2012-01-19T08:19:00.000-08:00

The Portland Trail Blazers had a players-only meeting last night. They were in the vistors' locker room at Philips Arena in Atlanta and had just suffered their fourth loss in five games.

"Exactly what happened in this Blazers meeting was not revealed during interviews with Aldridge, Crawford and Wesley Matthews," says Jason Quick in The Oregonian. "They all said it needed to stay in the locker room. But in private conversations with all three, a common theme was that they felt like the players were so close to each other that no one was holding each other accountable for mistakes on the court."

As I read the article about a team that might be too nice, I started to wonder if the church is "too nice." Quick says this about the Trail Blazer team dynamics: "They like each other. They trust each other. They respect each other. Now they just need to find a way to hold each other accountable."

2011-03-07T07:39:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.” Ephesians 5:18 is the biblical focus this morning at Hometown Friends Church.

Titled “Abstinence, Moderation, and Abuse,” the message admits the lack of a biblical mandate for total abstinence while clearly making a case for the dangers and damage linked with alcohol.

I’m thinking about how much has been given to this community (and this state) that could have easily been sucked into empty bottles. Years ago the founder of the local dental manufacturing company took a new path that turned toward a higher power and left addiction, “and that has made all the difference” for him and for so many others.

2009-09-30T07:34:00.000-07:00

After a week in the hospital and more than a week in a nursing home, my dad went home yesterday—not his eternal home, but the place where he and Hazel freely share their joys and hardships.

Dorothy was right. There’s no place like home.

2009-09-22T07:47:00.000-07:00

The Christian Bible studies newsletter is really nothing more than Christianity Today using their network to create a list for selling weekly advertisements and I can’t explain why I haven’t unsubscribed before now.

The most recent subject line was “John MacArthur wants to know – Do you know the REAL Jesus?” Yes, I do. And I can’t imagine that the real Jesus is happy about the ministry limitations John MacArthur thinks should be placed on women.

2009-09-21T07:07:00.000-07:00

My table by the window at Chapters gives me a good view of three lanes of headlights going through town. I imagine most are going to work. It’s not leisure driving. Anyone in the left lane is moving aggressively for a spot to their right before the three lanes become two. I wonder if they are thinking about the work they are headed toward or the weekend they are leaving behind.

Garrison Keillor’s recent statement following a mild stroke comes to mind: “Taking it easy makes me restless and unhappy...so work is what I do.”

2009-09-17T07:14:00.000-07:00

Cheap phone and internet service is wonderful.

I’m thinking about phone visits last evening. The first was with my dad in a hospital bed 400 miles away. The second was my daughter in Anthem, Arizona. Earlier in the day I clicked the right buttons to connect my father-in-law with his brother for a video chat that included the spouses and a few other family members.

I’m reminding myself that it’s not that hard to stay connected—with a little time and very little effort.

2009-09-16T07:37:00.000-07:00

Even as I move through the responsibilities of life at the office and at home, the fact that my dad has been in the hospital since Saturday evening is never far from the surface. It’s hard to know how attached he feels to this world. Some comments make it clear he’s anxious to move on to a better life. On the other hand he still enjoys the company of others and he still knows that life has meaning. I think it must be awkward to be at this stage of a very long race and still not see the finish line.

2009-09-14T12:38:00.000-07:00

“Do you welcome strangers into your life? Explain or illustrate.”

This is the Barclay Press Express Yourself question this week. Sometimes the stranger isn’t really a stranger. Saturday night I was sitting in the ambulance passenger seat in Caldwell, Idaho. My dad was in the back with two EMTs. The driver was the third EMT. I was 400 miles from home and, of course, had never seen these three men before they came to my dad and step-mom’s home 30 minutes earlier—and had no reason to see them again after going the short distance to the hospital.

This was not an emergency transport with sirens and a wall of silence between the drive and passenger seats would not serve my needs at the moment. We quickly stumbled into mutual connections. The superintendent of the Friends churches in the Northwest (with his office across the street from mine) was his pastor years ago at Homedale, Idaho, and the woman he is dating would have been a student at Newberg High School at the same time my oldest son was there.

It’s great fun to discover that the “stranger” isn’t.

2009-09-11T07:20:00.000-07:00

Eight years ago we celebrated Ethan’s eleventh birthday. It wasn’t the only thing that happened that day.

The years between 11 and 19 include extraordinary change. Those same eight years were dramatic (and tragic) for the United States. I’m thinking the journey through the teen years has some similarities to the political climate during much of the past eight years. It would be offensive to me (and to Ethan) to look for similarities with the Bush/Cheney years, but a few things start to come to mind when thinking about some generalities of male teens in tandem with the Bush Cheney era: pushing rules outside acceptable boundaries, seeking “justice” through retribution, anger, using aggressive behavior to hide insecurity, a tendency to be self-centered, creating unstable alliances, and way too much testosterone.

2009-09-10T07:32:00.001-07:00

I’m between two weekend trips to Idaho and I’m feeling uncertain. I don’t have any experience at being a good son to an aging father. My dad is at a stage where he takes life a day at a time. Perhaps I should do the same.

2009-09-08T07:11:00.000-07:00

Twenty-four hours ago I was in Caldwell, Idaho. I was there for a long-overdue visit with my dad. His 93-year-old body has (using car terms) a lot of miles on it.

What’s a son supposed to do? Is there anything I can do to make a difference for my dad and my step-mom who is carrying the load of his care? Answers seem illusive.

2009-09-04T08:24:00.000-07:00

The announcement of a new book release has me thinking about the word snark. The new book is titled The Snark Handbook: A Reference Guide to Verbal Sparring.

I’d love to have a mind that works fast enough feed words to my tongue in a steady stream of logic, wit, and uncommon insight. I think it's okay to have a sharp tongue, but I don't want it to wound. So, I’m wondering if it’s okay to be snarky. Where does the scale tip between clever and mean? Is verbal sparring a more acceptable activity than physical sparring? I’d rather debate than arm wrestle.

2009-04-26T13:39:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m four hours away from having filled my space in the pew. My daughter, Abbie, just introduced me to Philip Zimbardo and the Stanford Prison Experiment. Tomorrow night she’s going over to Linfield College to hear Zimbardo. Abbie’s brief description of the Stanford Prison Experiment and a ten minute YouTube video gave me a reality check on the nature of living on this side of Eden.

2009-04-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

I didn’t know anything about John Ulwelling until yesterday. He died February 13 at age 66. I learned this when my daughter in Arizona phoned. One of the online tributes she had read about her friend was written by Greg Skipper of Montgomery, Alabama. She thought it sounded like Greg Skipper of Newberg, Oregon, from years ago (and it was). John Ulwelling had been president of the Foundation for Medical Excellence and prior to that he was executive director of the Oregon Board of Medical Examiners. My daughter had worked at a Portland law firm that shared some office space with John. This is where she discovered that John was a man of unusual quality with great personal sensitivity.

I didn’t know John, but I have two people in my human web who were also in his and what they have said about him waters fertile soil in my soul.

2009-04-02T06:37:00.000-07:00

Reflecting back on a recent conversation, I’m thinking about words like persistent, perseverant, diligent, and resolute. My friend told me the exact number of times (thirty-nine) he talked to a landowner about buying a specific piece of land. All but the last time he was told no in very certain terms. Roger had a vision—a mission—and he didn’t give up. So I’m thinking about what I can learn from the way Roger has repeatedly used determination to make God-pleasing things happen.

2009-03-31T07:42:00.000-07:00

I’ve been working on a presentation about changes in book publishing. Quakers Uniting in Publications will be meeting in Oregon the middle of April and they asked me to present a session titled “Beyond the Book.” In this business of connecting writers and readers, it’s not enough to see where we have been and where we are. But trying to see where we might be even in just five years is difficult. One of the certainties is that change will win out over tradition.

2009-03-28T13:40:00.000-07:00

Trina would have turned 39 today. I sometimes wonder if it is hyperbole when someone says, “Not a day does by that I don’t think about….” I’ll admit I haven’t thought about Trina every day for the past 15 plus years, but I do hold her in a special place somewhere in my inner self. And I certainly think of her every March 28.

2009-02-15T16:59:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Today we are talking about how the biblical text guides our lives. Given the current state of the global economy, I’m wondering if Bible believing Christians should put greed on the agenda up in those prime spots along with abortion and same-sex marriage.

2009-02-08T13:38:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The scripture reading is Psalm 43. I’m wondering if the psalmist is on an emotional roller coaster. “Why did you walk out on me?” he asks God. Then three verses later he says God puts a smile on his face and “He’s my God.” Sometimes I try to hide my feelings by painting a layer of logic over my emotions. I want to look more rational than I am. Seems to me that the psalmist just put it out there the way it was in the moment.

2009-02-02T07:51:00.001-08:00

Yesterday the worship leader at church suggested we bow before the Lord as we sang one of the songs. The objective was to change the posture of our attitudes rather than our bodies. I started thinking about the two ends of a spectrum with arrogance on one end and humility on the other. Both sociology and religion point out that egocentric people are unhealthy. But I wonder about overreacting and taking humility, deference, and unworthiness to a place where we overlook the fact we are made in the image of God.

2009-01-28T08:07:00.000-08:00

I didn’t take the time to read the feature article about stress in this morning’s paper. I felt the clock ticking on a busy day and I was feeling some pressure from the things that need to be done yesterday. January has gone so fast and it seems I’m loosing ground. I glanced at the questions in a little quiz that gives some indication of stress level. I noticed journaling in the list of things that can help counteract stress. Then it was time to move on with the demands of the day.

2009-01-26T07:56:00.000-08:00

Saturday I was going through some magazines and noted an ad for a book titled Thrift published by Templeton Foundation Press. The price was $34.95. It’s a 9x11 inches, 360 pages, and evidently has a lot of black and white photos. A book of this size with photos can justify a $34.95 price tag, but I feel some incongruence. A $34.95 book that “showcases a beautiful and historic collection of thrift artifacts and memorabilia from around the world”—there’s something about it that would make me uncomfortable to have it on my coffee table. The magazine where I saw the ad was a few months old and when I checked Amazon I was pleased to see the book in paperback at half the price. But I didn’t order it.

2009-01-25T12:37:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The welcome has been extended, the scripture has been read, and now the four guys leading the music this morning are on the platform with drums, guitars, and a bass. I’m aware of how some feel about this kind of music and I’m letting this distract me. I’m wondering how the old hymn with the “Thy” and “Thine” language came into the mix. Did it involve capitulation? Or do young people tolerate (and appreciate) a variety of music more than old people do? My guess is both are true, but that the second is more the case than the first.

2009-01-24T13:11:00.000-08:00

I was probably among those who thought Barack Obama’s inaugural address would have some oratorical highlight with an obvious potential of becoming historical. I expect Obama knew this crowd already had enough emotional adrenalin flowing. January 20 was his day to begin governing and to call a country to address the challenges of change. This was a time for a resolute presentation of critical issues. There will be other days when he will use oratory to target emotions as well as the mind.

2009-01-21T07:34:00.000-08:00

Is the optimism that accompanies the inauguration of Barack Obama justified? Absolutely. Not because the new president has the power and wisdom to solve all the problems facing our country and world, but because hope is contagious and despair is crippling.

2009-01-20T08:04:00.000-08:00

When the election of the first Black U.S. President has been referred to as the fulfillment of Martin Luther King’s dream, I’ve cringed. Does this historic (and highly significant) event mean we have done something substantive to address the disparity between the rich and the poor? Does justice roll down like water? Did prejudice become a thing of the past on November 4? Was greed abolished? Have we abandoned the attitudes and tools of violence? Can the current racial divide that is so evident in socio-economic statistics be ignored when talking about Martin Luther King’s dream?

2009-01-18T13:02:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. I’m sitting just one row up from the back of the sanctuary and one of the pillars that support the balcony is in a direct line between me and the pulpit. A moment ago I was visually aligning the pillar with vertical lines in the structure of the wall at the back of the platform. It all looks square and solid. I had another attention lapse earlier when I was trying to get the spot in my variable lenses where I could see clearly the small print of the credits at the bottom of the screen.

But I didn’t miss the heartfelt prayer for our country and our new President. And I didn’t miss the reminder that among us and all around us are hurting people who are suffering in a medical crisis, crippled by a moral failure, or wounded emotionally to the point of feeling that love and hope are out of reach.

2009-01-11T11:08:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered—but I’m not one of them. When I went to bed last night, I thought I would take my feeble back to church this morning. I changed my mind and now I’m in the family room watching Meet the Press instead of filling a space on a pew. David Gregory’s second panel of guests includes Alvin Poussaint, Bill Cosby, Maxine Waters, and Adrian Fenty. The inauguration of the first African-American president in a week and 2 days seems to be the reason for this set of guests, but the discussion is about social issues instead of being about a political event. If Cosby’s remarks were a Sunday morning sermon, the three points complete with alliteration might be: change, choices, and challenge.

2009-01-10T15:42:00.000-08:00

I’ve been having trouble with my back this week. It started Monday and midweek I phoned for a doctor’s appointment. There was an opening for Friday morning that I took, but I was thinking: Surely I’ll be better by then. I wasn’t.

This week I’ve thought about my dad when it hurts to get up from sitting on a chair, when putting on my socks and shoes is painful, and when I use the "buttocks first" approach for getting in the car. My temporary discomfort isn’t significant enough that I can claim to empathize with my dad’s mobility issues, but it does remind me to sympathize.

2009-01-04T12:01:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The presentation on “Why give regularly?” has me thinking about ratios. I’m thinking that if it weren’t for overhead, one out of every eleven people in the church could be released to do ministry. To me this thought is as interesting as it is unrealistic.

2009-01-03T10:52:00.000-08:00

The story about Gaza in The Oregonian is several pages in from the front and didn’t include any numbers of deaths in Gaza or in Israel. During Israel’s eight days of military attacks on the Gaza Strip, the number of Palestinians killed now exceeds 450. The last I heard, the number of Israelis killed was 4.

I remember an episode in the television series The West Wing in which President Bartlett was confronted with the principle of proportional response. A plane with the President’s personal physician and other American citizens had been shot down killing all on board. An angry Bartlett interrupts as the Joint Chiefs of Staff outline response options. “What is the virtue of a proportional response? Why is it good?” The President goes back and forth with his chief of staff, and an admiral about the nature of a proportional response and then the admiral says there is nothing virtuous but it’s all there is. An enraged Bartlett says there is another option—a disproportional response. “Let the word ring worth from this time and this place, gentlemen, you kill an American, any American, we don’t come back with a proportional response, we come back,” his hand hits the table and rattles the glasses, “with total disaster.”

Bartlett subdued his passion for revenge before he issued his order. Israel hasn’t.

2009-01-01T12:41:00.000-08:00

Brain tumors are really bad news. Medical science has made significant advances in how to treat them. But treatment is not cure. Andrew had surgery and treatment during his junior year of high school. In September he started his senior year.

My observation is that when a brain tumor comes back, it’s vicious and intense. For Andrew it did come back and Tuesday night it took his life.

Comfort, comfort my people, says your God. (Isaiah 40:1)

2008-12-28T13:17:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Here at Hometown Friends Church, the pastor to youth has a passion for Christ-like service to the disenfranchised. He is speaking this morning about love all. The love he is talking about involves more than the mind and emotions. Most of us buy the theory; it’s the practice where I stumble.

2008-12-01T07:57:00.000-08:00

A teenage boy in a Mumbai, India, hospital bed will soon learn the truth. He’s been told that his parents will soon be found and they will come see him. Perhaps the boy needed hope more than he needed truth. But soon he will be dealing with the fact that he is an orphan and then he will also have to deal with the fact that he was deceived.

I’m thinking I’d like those around me to never feel they need to withhold the truth in order to protect me.

2008-11-30T15:13:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. We aren’t singing the Christmas songs yet here at Hometown Friends Church, but we did have an advent message. After the service the standard question is, “How was your Thanksgiving?” Conversation with a friend sent my thoughts (and words) to the balance between time with friends and family compared to time alone. I need both. I’m guessing it would be good for me to create some time segments alone—away from home, work, and other people.

“Though what I dream and what I do
In my weak days are always two,
Help me, oppressed by things undone,
O Thou whose deeds and dreams were one!” (John Hunter)

2008-11-02T11:13:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. We’re sitting in the balcony today. The pews don’t have the fabric cushion, but the view is good. Time was just given for both silent and verbal nonpartisan prayer for the election and the country. My nonverbal prayer is, “Lord, I confess I need your help to know how to uphold my convictions without the arrogance of ‘I’m right and anyone who disagrees is wrong.’”

2008-10-26T11:34:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. My body is here at Hometown Friends Church, but my mind and emotions are not 100% engaged. I’m trying to get a clear picture of “joy.” Perhaps my view is so tainted by a modern cultural view of joy that I can’t reach far enough to understand what the Apostle Paul is saying. My best guess is that the scripture today from Galatians 4 and 5 is telling me that joy increases as I decrease the amount I sweat the small stuff.

2008-10-19T13:07:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. A couple of minutes ago the pastor asked us to think of someone who is different than me. And now people have just shared a good array of differences they pictured. The thing conspicuous by its absence is economic status. I was picturing a homeless man as someone different than me. But I didn’t say anything when we were given the opportunity and others who were looking across the economic divide also remained silent. I’m not sure what to make of this silence when the difference between the “haves” and the “have nots” is a significant scar on our planet.

2008-10-12T11:27:00.001-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. We are looking at Galatians 2:19–3:6. It has something to do with living by the law or living by the Spirit. I’m hearing the word mystical this morning and now I’m wondering if you have to be just a little bit crazy to be really religious. Since Christianity is much more than subscribing to lists of things I can or can’t do, how far does that move us toward the irrational? I’m wondering how many of the divides (i.e., abortion, gay rights) are driven by the “law” instead of “spirit.”

2008-10-05T12:23:00.001-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. I’m looking to my left to spot Joel Perez. I expect he’s there even though he’s not in my line of sight right now. He and Robin Baker were referenced in Steve Duin’s column this morning. I’m thinking the way Robin, Joel and others responded to the recent incident on the local university campus was dynamic Christian proclamation. And I’m remembering that what we do between the Sundays is more important than what is going to happen here in the next 60 minutes.

2008-09-28T16:46:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The service is now almost over and we have the option of singing one of two songs. Along the theme of encountering God, people who today feel separated from God just sang “Sometimes I feel like I’m almost gone”—changed words for “Sometimes I feel like a motherless child.” And now those who feel connected with God today are singing “’tis so sweet to trust in Jesus.” More sang the second song, but the room was not quiet when the first was sung.

2008-09-25T08:02:00.000-07:00

I’m wondering if the current economic crisis is also a moral crisis. The explanations I’m hearing are all in economic and political terms. But I’m thinking we don’t have to drill very far into this situation before we hit greed.

2008-09-21T14:31:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Instead of being with the group at Hometown Friends Church, I’m with a crowd of 40,000 believers in Stumptown. The common belief at this gathering is that something needs to be done about breast cancer. The Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure is an annual event. It was six years ago that I walked the 5K with family for the first time. The event followed right on the heals of Cindy’s breast cancer diagnosis and surgery. I’m grateful for all the private dollars that are going into cancer research and treatment.

“Where’s the outrage?” was a sign a participant carried. I'm curious how we as a country justify spending more tax money in Iraq than we do on fighting cancer.

2008-09-14T16:01:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. This morning at Hometown Friends Church we are talking about evangelism in the context of “show and tell.” The word evangelism brings up some uncomfortable images for me. One example is the question “If you were to die tonight, do you know where you would spend eternity?” I don’t see this as a productive question to ask a stranger.

Today I’m hearing the “show and tell” aspects of sharing Jesus not as things to keep on opposite sides of a balance scale, but as a blend that holds the showing and the telling close enough that actions and words are seamless.

This talk about evangelism has triggered an old memory from more than 25 years ago. Television evangelist James Robison was holding a crusade in Jackson, Mississippi, and I had interviewed him. The questions included some inquiry about where care for the poor was on his agenda. Within a day or two after the interview, in our home I was talking with a friend about James Robison. My critical, cynical attitude came into a new light when the friend told me it was at a James Robison meeting that she and her mother became Christians.

I try to remember that God uses people and methods that don’t fit inside my paradigms.

2008-09-07T18:29:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. At the moment I’m a little sidetracked. The scripture for the message (Luke 7:36-50) starts with, “Now one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him.” This has my thoughts going a different direction than the focus or purpose of this reading. The Pharisees and Jesus weren’t exactly on the same page—socially or in their perspective about what religion really means. So I’m curious about this Pharisee. I wonder if he was a sincere seeker of truth or was this dinner a setup. I like to think that Jesus accepted the invitation and went to dinner not knowing what the motivation was behind the event. That kind of risk taking seems to me like the way of Jesus.

2008-08-31T16:18:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The pastor has been talking about Esther. Now at the end of the service he is making available cards that say “…for such a time as this. Esther 4:14” I think Stephen Grellet would have appreciated this service.

Stephen Grellet (1773-1855): “I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good thing, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to any fellow human being let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”

2008-08-30T14:42:00.000-07:00

My early impression is that Sarah Palin is a good person and it seems obvious she is a gifted politician. But I don’t think anyone knows if she is a statesperson. I expect we will occasionally hear her name in the news after November, but as I see it the next two months will be the summit of her political career.

If by some chance the political power of the Republican Party managed to twist their way to victory, I expect Palin being a heartbeat from the presidency would create an outbreak of heartburn and insomnia across the country.

2008-08-29T07:36:00.000-07:00

I like Barney Smith. Barney lives in Marion, Indiana, but last night he was on the stage at Invesco Field. He’s been a Republican most of his life, but the economic policies of the past eight years have put him in a place where he is glad to stand in front of 75,000 Democrats and say, “We need a president who puts Barney Smith before Smith Barney.” Barney was one of several “regular people” who represented the millions who need a government that cares about the socially and economically disenfranchised.

2008-08-24T19:58:00.000-07:00

The last four days we got some pictures that will likely show up on our Christmas greeting in December. Since they fall outside the “work, eat, sleep” cycle, these photos will help create an impression that we live a balanced life.

2008-08-23T09:58:00.000-07:00

I had at least two legit reasons it might not be a good idea for me to go out in the kayak with my teenage son. I asked myself if I might regret a missed opportunity more than I would regret the orthopedic consequences. Then I put on sun screen and ditched my shoes. We went up the Siletz Bay, under the 101 bridge, and turned back downstream at the house where Sometimes a Great Notion was filmed. I thought we would then be going down stream, but we quickly discovered incoming tide trumps river current. The sky was clear, but a physical and emotional cloud drifted over the "against the tide" return trip.

The bottom line is that I made the right decision.

2008-08-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

I’m sure the IOC has carefully defined and strictly enforced rules about how country names appear on Olympic uniforms. It seems to me there is something wrong about “China” in English on the Chinese uniforms. I’m wondering how I would feel if I were Chinese and sitting in the stands reading my country name in English. I’d probably make some cynical remark like: “I guess size and host status doesn’t mean as much as I thought it should.” Or maybe I would be so influenced by the international dominance of the English alphabet that I wouldn’t give it a second thought.

2008-08-21T09:31:00.001-07:00

I would not want the word to get out that I was the only guy at a chic flick yesterday afternoon in Lincoln City at the Bijou Theater. And I certainly would not start talking about what Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 might have said about relationships with parents and friends. When I said something positive about the experience when talking on the phone with our son right after the movie, Ethan’s skeptical response was: “The only reason you’re saying that is because Mom is right there.” I don’t think it’s true, but I understand why he said it.

2008-08-12T07:56:00.001-07:00

The “express yourself” question this week on the Barclay Press Web site asks which of the deadly sins is the most dangerous. I’d say John Edwards ate the pride/lust combo. That’s one toxic sandwich.

2008-08-10T13:56:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Early in the service we each wrote our name on a strip of colored paper. Then these were taped in linked loops to create a chain. Now I’m thinking about the next layer of community—people like the adult daughters of the couple to our right. And I’m thinking about our own children. I connect with a variety of people in a variety of ways, but the parent-child relationship is obviously unique.

2008-08-09T10:04:00.000-07:00

I think there is something to be said for living in the moment—giving attention to the people and activities of this point in time. Sometimes, like even right now, I use living in the moment as a bubble that provides a thin membrane giving only a sense of isolation from (1) the things coming up for which I’m unprepared, and (2) tasks not completed that ideally would now be relegated to the past.

2008-08-07T08:05:00.001-07:00

My use of “emotionally safe” a couple of days ago has started to bother me. The thought I was expressing was my feeling that Surfside camp at Twin Rocks is a place where it is okay to be yourself. I think the campers are accepted as they are. But is a teen ever in an emotionally safe place? Can they ever escape the concern about what other people think? Are their fears and questions ever out of sight and out of mind? Do they ever get a recess from hormonal changes raging inside? I’m afraid “emotionally safe” falls into the category of hyperbole.

2008-08-05T20:06:00.000-07:00

I have zero interest in reliving my high school years. But if I were a high schooler in 2008, I would want to be at Twin Rocks Friends Camp this week. Sunday afternoon I watched as more than 200 young people checked in.

This is not a cookie-cutter group. I see the variety as a good thing.

One of the reasons I would want to be at Twin Rocks is because it is an emotionally safe place where everyone from counselors to cooks would want me to be a better person when I left than when I came.

2008-08-02T10:24:00.000-07:00

I was confident we would have leftovers when I was cutting beef, and then chicken, for kabobs. I was wrong. Abbie’s 21st birthday is Monday, but our barbecue celebration was last night. Of the roughly 35 people who showed up, Abbie was the only person who knew everyone in the mix of family, Tilikum summer staff, and other friends. The age range went from mid-teens to early 90s. When Abbie so naturally took the lead in the call-and-response penguin camp song, I saw the confidence and competence of a girl who has become a fine young woman.

2008-07-31T07:32:00.000-07:00

I don’t know what to think of the Los Angeles City Council decision to place a one-year moratorium on new fast food outlets in South L.A. I’m thinking it’s a little like using a topical ointment when under the skin a bone is broken. What will change during this one-year experiment? Not the income or education level of the area residents. A more creative and effective approach would have been to find ways to reduce the demand instead of trying to limit the supply.

2008-07-30T07:06:00.000-07:00

My granddaughter will already have three weeks of school under her belt when Labor Day gets here. In Anthem, Arizona, school starts in less than two weeks. My daughter emailed yesterday to say a backpack we picker out at REI 21 years ago is being passed to the next generation. So now I’m thinking about enduring quality. And I’m thinking about the lasting things that aren’t “things.”

2008-07-26T14:32:00.000-07:00

The subject line was “Invitation to the Swearing-In of Joseph LeBaron, US Ambassador to Qatar.” I knew my step brother had been appointed, but was surprised to discover the swearing-in would take place at Portland State University.

PSU president Dr. Michael Reardon, Oregon Supreme Court Chief Justice Paul DeMuniz, and Ambassador Joseph LeBaron along with his wife, Ellie, and daughter, Petra, came out the west side door of Simon Benson house one week ago yesterday at 4:00 p.m. and sat in front of a group of chairs under a large canopy.

It is believed to be the first time a career diplomat (Foreign Service officer) has been sworn in as ambassador in a public ceremony held inside the United States but not in Washington, D.C. The ceremony was dignified without in any way being stiff.

Joe’s mother and my father were married at Thanksgiving time during my sophomore year of high school. Our points of connection since high school have been limited, but I’ve watched Joe from a distance with admiration.

I thought I would like to toast Joe at a dinner after the ceremony with extended family. That toast would have been: “To words well chosen; to nuances read accurately; to an open mind and an open heart; to boldness and to wisdom. May the path forward have as much personal fulfillment as this day has had public affirmation.”

2008-07-22T07:38:00.000-07:00

The owners of the espresso and book store on First Street told me last night they were a little uncomfortable Sunday when the announcement came up on the screen at their church for the Tony Campolo book signing that will be held at their place this afternoon. They don’t want to use the church to promote their business and they don’t want anyone to wonder if they are doing that.

As a denominational publisher I see a lot of overlap between ministry and commerce. And there is a large grey area for them as well. For Christian book publishers and sellers, maybe instead of commerce being on one end of the spectrum and ministry on the other, perhaps it is all about commerce and all about ministry.

2008-07-13T15:49:00.001-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Today at Hometown Friends it is one service instead of three and it’s out on the lawn instead of inside the building.

The word I’m hearing from 2 Chronicles 30 today is that even though the people did not get all their "i"s dotted and their "t"s crossed, grace entered the picture. I associate the legalism of the law with the Old Testament and I tend to think that grace premiers in the New Testament. There is a fallacy in this thinking if grace is part of the character of God.

2008-07-11T07:58:00.000-07:00

Sunday evening John Perkins will receive the 2008 Jordan Lifetime Achievement Award from the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association. It will happen at a big banquet in Orlando, Florida, where Christian authors, publishers, and retails will come together for the International Christian Retail Show.

I’m thinking about the people who will be standing (figuratively) with him as he receives the award. Mr. Buckley and his prayers will be there. He and his wife were farmers near Mendenhall who held the Perkins family under their wing. His prayers that John’s accomplishment and recognitions would not go to his head had a reach well beyond Mr. Buckley’s lifetime.

John and Vera Mae’s son, Spencer, will be standing with him. Spencer’s sudden death ten years ago left a big hole. But it also left a legacy. It was Spencer’s decision to follow Christ that was the catalyst for that same radical change in his dad’s life.

I don’t know if Mrs. Perkins will go to Orlando with John, but she is the third person standing with John in my mind—just as she has for 57 years.

2008-07-09T07:55:00.000-07:00

Nonplussed is an interesting word. It’s a bit of what I’m feeling, but I’m also weary and restless. It seems like there should be a word for the feeling when we don’t know what to think or do about a situation (or a feeling) and it leaves us bouncing between apathetic and driven.

2008-07-04T11:31:00.000-07:00

The large type on a full page in the paper today says: “Immigrants: The Pride of America.” The Carnegie Corporation is saluting immigrants who “have made, and continue to make, our nation strong and vibrant.” Nearly 50 names and photos include authors, athletes, actors, business leaders, college presidents, musicians, and scientists (but no farm workers).

2008-06-24T07:59:00.000-07:00

Allison is 21 and last night we went to her birthday barbeque. Allison and our daughter Abbie have been friends since the days when they were wearing the onesies.

During the evening I was reminded that it was Allison's great grandfather who gave me the news that my grandmother had died. This was the grandmother (my mom’s mother) who during the childhood years of Allison’s grandmother, took care of the Brown children when the parents had to be away.

And the notion that relationships flow both deep and wide was reinforced when Allison’s uncle recounted the bicycle trek he and Abbie’s oldest brother took across Oregon from Newberg to Adrian.

All of that and much, much more was yesterday. The greatest thing for Allison and for Abbie is the tomorrows.

2008-06-20T08:05:00.000-07:00

The 1988 Newberg High School graduating class will hold its 20th reunion September 13. This is Trina’s class. Night before last I responded to a request from one of her classmates for a photo and remembrance that could be displayed at the event.

Trina’s classmate replied with a “thanks” for sending the material. The line below her name and phone number was: I've seen and met angels wearing the disguise of ordinary people living ordinary lives (Tracy Chapman). This might be part of her current automatic email signature, or it might be unique to this one message. Either way works for me.

2008-06-13T22:15:00.000-07:00

My two sisters and his sister will be with my dad in Caldwell, Idaho, on Father’s Day. I’ll be here in Newberg—400 miles away.

Perseverance comes to mind as I think about my dad. You can’t make a living with 80 acres and a herd of Jerseys unless you have a lot of perseverance. The word also applies before and after his years on the farm.

Growing up without a mom is a road with steep hills and switchbacks—a ditch on one side and an abyss on the other. His mother died when he was two. I’m thinking that’s when my dad started learning perseverance from his dad.

2008-06-12T07:17:00.000-07:00

The Relay for Life theme this year is Celebrate, Remember, Fight Back. The tenacious aggression of cancer demands a concerted response. Cancer is a pit bull and letting it wander loose is really not an option.

2008-06-11T07:33:00.000-07:00

I’m trying to imagine what a transparent overlay of Mark Hatfield and the Vietnam War might look like over top of the U.S. military involvement in Iraq. I’m going over Lon Fendall’s manuscript for a book on Hatfield that Barclay Press is publishing. I can’t imagine anyone reading Hatfield’s long (and often lonely) journey of opposition to the Vietnam War without thinking about Iraq.

2008-06-10T07:31:00.000-07:00

“Something there is that doesn’t love a wall.” Robert Frost’s words came to mind as I backed out of the driveway this morning and noted the fresh bark dust on the little berm on the neighbor’s side of our property line. A year ago it was continuous grass without a line that defined what was ours and what was theirs. From a landscaping perspective, it is an improvement. But like Robert Frost said, “Something there is that doesn’t love a wall.”

2008-06-03T07:57:00.000-07:00

The next 24 hours is a significant period on the road to the White House for Barak Obama. It involves the last 2 primary elections, undeclared delegates announcing their candidate, and a “victory” speech. I’d love to hear Obama say, “This is not a victory speech. In this campaign there is only one victory speech and that will be in November.”

Moments ago I heard Cat Stevens singing, “Now I’ve been crying lately, thinking about the world as it is. Why must we go on hating, why can't we live in bliss. 'Cause out on the edge of darkness, there rides a peace train. Oh peace train take this country, come take me home again.”

2008-06-01T15:04:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Hometown Friends Church is trying to take a break from the normal routine. It’s a time to slow down and make some intentional efforts to look and listen for what God is doing and wants to do in our lives—individually and corporately. Today our looking does not include being able to see a printed schedule for the service. I like knowing what’s coming next, but right now I have no more idea of what’s coming in the next 60 minutes than I do of what’s coming in the next seven days.

2008-05-30T07:50:00.000-07:00

I doubt that God intended for the frontal cortex of the male teenage brain to develop so slowly. Teenage males are a disaster zone with their undeveloped capacity for making good judgments, anticipating consequences, and engaging in positive decision-making and planning. And on top of the low horsepower for good decision-making, adolescents are attracted to risk-taking behavior. This all looks to me more like the curse than the creation.

2008-05-26T10:42:00.000-07:00

I’m wondering about the first 14 years of J. R. Simplot’s life. Simplot’s death at 99 made the front page of the Oregonian and now I’m thinking again about the role of hardship. When Simplot went out on his own as a 14-year-old, his mother gave him four $20 gold coins. Over the years he turned that $80 into more than three billion. I’m guessing the first 14 years had a profound impact on the next 85.

2008-05-25T12:28:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Some people who would normally be here are out of town for the Memorial Day weekend and most of us don’t have to go to work tomorrow. I think a cloud of holiday disengagement hovers over my head. Today we are looking at prayer through the biblical character Daniel. It’s a new revelation to me that Daniel was in his 80s when he was thrown into the lion’s den.

I’m not sure what to think about hardship. It’s something I try to avoid and I don't wish it on anyone else. But I wonder if we would be reading about Daniel if he had spent his life in Jerusalem and had not been taken into captivity by the Babylonians.

2008-05-23T07:37:00.000-07:00

I’m thinking about the differences between self-deprecation and humility. When I try to quip about my shortcomings, it probably says more about insecurity and low self esteem instead of reflecting humility. I’m thinking confidence is actually a better partner for humility than self-deprecation.

2008-05-22T08:34:00.000-07:00

I like Jimmy Carter so it stands to reason that I would like people he likes. Carter says of his presidential campaign strategist and White House chief of staff: "His judgment, insight, and wisdom were excelled only by his compassion and love of our country."

Another reason for me to like Hamilton Jordan is because he is related to Clarence Jordan, founded Koinonia Farms in Americus, Georgia, and author of The Cotton Patch Version of Matthew and John.

It was Hamilton Jordan who wrote an 80-page master plan for Jimmy Carter that was followed in the four years prior to Carter’s election on November 2, 1976. Hamilton Jordan was 34 when he became Jimmy Carter’s chief of staff. He had grown up in a small, segregated Georgia community. A pivotal point in his view of race relations came when he was a teenager and his father took him to watch a civil rights march. He saw the police surround the black demonstrators and drive them into an alleyway. He heard screams from blacks and approving shouts from whites. Jordan wrote: “Later I would mark that day as a moment of moral failure in my life."

Hamilton Jordan died Tuesday evening—another victim of cancer.

2008-05-21T07:29:00.000-07:00

I ran across the term anchoring committee recently. Some Friends (Quakers) gather a small group of people for support and guidance over a period of time for an extended ministry project. I see being “well anchored” as generally a positive thing, but on a boat I think the purpose of an anchor is to prevent movement.

2008-05-18T17:17:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Something that happens twice a month in this building is YoungLives. It’s a meal, activities, and support for teen moms. We’re watching a slide show about the program. Looking at the faces of these teen moms and their babies, I’m wondering if they suffer from feelings of shame. It’s been more than 25 years since I went through divorce and there are still times I feel a little embarrassed about it. I hope these teen moms don’t include shame in the heavy load they carry. I don’t see how that would be productive.

2008-05-16T07:20:00.000-07:00

“I have no complaints.” It was a bold answer to the perfunctory “How are you?” question.

What about the pot holes down the street that never get repaired? The price of gas? The ratio between the length of the meeting and the amount accomplished? Too hot, too cold, too much rain…? Too many things to do and not enough time?

No complaints? It must have been hyperbole.

2008-05-13T07:17:00.000-07:00

Even a non musician can appreciate the perfect blending of voices or instruments. The Irish brogue in the movie Once is more easily understood in the harmonious songs than in the dialog. “Take this sinking boat and point it home. We’ve still got time.” Hearing the melodious song a moment ago has me thinking about trying to get a little more harmony in the inner parts of my mind and spirit.

2008-05-11T15:18:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. I’d rather be thinking about Mother’s Day and the people around me, but I’m stuck reflecting on bowing down to idols. Materialism and nationalism are much more dangerous idols than the oversized statue in the third chapter of Daniel. Getting on your knees and bending your back when the music plays is merely a physical exercise that is spiritually harmless. Why not go through the motions, but use the state-sponsored time to turn your heart and mind toward the real God? Why blow your God-given potential and strategic placement? If I had been in the story, I would have known the right thing to do.

2008-05-07T07:46:00.000-07:00

It’s not easy to refine or evaluate what I took away from the impromptu conversation yesterday with a friend. He was in the building on other business and stepped in the office for five minutes that turned into an hour. He grew up a preacher’s kid, but that was a long time ago. His journey has included ministry within the organized church, but his more recent history is outside the organized structures. “Church” for him is about relationship with Jesus and the contacts with others that Jesus instigates. I don’t know what I take away from that conversation yesterday, but it has something to do with relationship.

2008-05-04T16:32:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. I’m listening to a message from the second chapter of the book of Daniel. What I’m hearing has me thinking about the word “mystic.” “Mystery” is as close as the pastor has come in word usage. I’ll check the dictionary when I get home, but I’m thinking Daniel fits the definition of a mystic.

2008-05-03T10:12:00.000-07:00

I’m looking out the window at robin’s sticking their heads into the grass for food. This is a much preferred sign of the season than the proliferation of tacky yard sale posters.

2008-05-02T07:44:00.001-07:00

Perhaps some decisions don’t have a “right” option. Dmitri Nabokov is the 73 year old son of Russian novelist Vladimir Nabokov. When the novelist died more than 30 years ago, he left instructions for his heirs to burn the handwritten index cards that were the rough draft of his final work that he was feverishly trying to finish before he died. Now Dmitri has decided the work should be published. I wonder how you say “moral dilemma” in Russian.

2008-04-30T07:55:00.000-07:00

It’s 4:30 p.m. in Rome so Abbie and the others doing the George Fox University Juniors Abroad Rome to Paris trip have been on the ground for half an hour. The size of the world will have changed by the time Abbie steps off the plane back at PDX in three weeks. The exposure to history will have stretched the world across time. Different languages, foods, and customs will help erode American assumptions and arrogance. She will have a new realization that while she is a resident of Newberg, Oregon, she is also a global resident with neighbors who speak a different language and who do not march to the beat of an American drum.

2008-04-27T12:45:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The passage from the Bible for today is the first chapter of Daniel. A minute ago the pastor was talking about verse two. It tells about things from the Jewish temple in Jerusalem being taken to Babylonia and put into the temple for their gods. This example of things lost in captivity has me thinking now about the movie Things We Lost in the Fire. Things lost in national conquest or in a garage fire are “things” and Daniel models the truth that values, character, convictions, and relationships have greater substance than things.

2008-04-26T14:25:00.000-07:00

I was at an event yesterday that had a printed program. It was a hooding ceremony for people receiving a master’s degree in counseling and the items on the schedule were things like processional, invocation, special music, hooding, awards, and benediction. I don’t understand why the music gets an adjective when none of the others do. The music was good but I thought the prayer at the end was more special.

2008-04-22T07:33:00.000-07:00

Mention in the paper this morning that Pennsylvania has a comparative large percentage of people over 65 got me thinking about age and voting. I’ve ended up with the notion that it is good to think of the next generation when voting. What a president does lives long after the term of office. Perhaps an appropriate question is: “Were your grandchildren better off eight years ago?”

2008-04-20T13:54:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. The title of the message is one of the first things I look for in the handout we get at the door. Today it is the Holy Spirit and I instantly wonder if the pastor has read It’s a Dance and whether he might reference the book. And now I’m asking myself if this thought is self serving because of my role in the publication of that book. Am I motivated by ego or mission? I’m putting the two on opposite sides of my mental balance scale. Neither one is light and I can’t see which way the scale is tipping.

2008-04-17T07:29:00.000-07:00

Monday I had lunch with an out-of-town friend who has been doing some thinking and writing about the hard places in life. Where is God when everything is going wrong? Who should we blame when life is all messed up—God, ourselves, both, neither? Where is the path out of the dark night?

He doesn’t buy into the old theory that when bad things happen to you it’s a good indication of hidden, unconfused sin in your life. I don’t either.

2008-04-13T13:58:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Right now I’m building a little bridge between last Sunday and today. A week ago the topic for the message was atonement. Last night I saw for the first time the movie with that same name. It reminded me that we can make some bad mistakes and not get a “do over.” My little bridge that connects to this week’s message about poverty is that as a nation we can never atone (or get a do over) for our sins against the poor that are often well concealed, but came to light for a time with Hurricane Katrina.

2008-04-10T07:26:00.000-07:00

If I had been born female, where would I be today? This question crossed my mind last night out of some reminder of the issue of gender equity. It’s an uncomfortable thought and I don’t like my answers. For one thing I don’t think I would be the publisher at Barclay Press.

2008-04-08T07:47:00.000-07:00

At 7:05 one person was already waiting for the school bus where our loop meets the road on the north side of this group of homes. She lives about five houses down from us. I think she is still in grade school, but moving quickly toward middle school. We wave at each other. A few drops of rain are hitting my windshield. A little rain is nothing compared to what she has already faced. We don’t all know each other within our neighborhood, but we do enjoy a high level of care for one another.

2008-04-06T14:49:00.000-07:00

It’s Sunday morning and the faithful have gathered. Atonement is the topic today and it has me thinking about intimacy. God desires intimacy. That relationship was first broken in the Garden of Eden and it’s never been the same. God’s done a lot of repair and reconstruction work, but we’re pretty hard to fix.

2008-04-04T07:13:00.000-07:00

The April issue of Christianity Today has an article titled, “How to Save the Christian Bookstore.” Any thought that rumors of the Christian bookstore’s demise may be exaggerated doesn’t resonate with me.

1. Small independent stores are in trouble whether they sell books that are targeted for Christians or they sell widgets. The ubiquitous trend toward consolidation is hard to ignore.

2. Are people reading more or less? Studies done by the National Endowment for the Arts aren’t exactly encouraging for booksellers.

3. Has the internet reached the peak of its impact on brick and mortar stores? Not a chance.

4. Maybe it would be better to have bookstores operated by Christians instead of Christian bookstores. Although I use the term Christian bookstore, I’m not fond of it. I like the word Christian a lot better when it’s a noun than when it’s an adjective.

2008-04-01T07:47:00.000-07:00

I like order (even though you would not guess it to see my desk). I like answers that make sense.

Why do bad things happen to good people?

That’s a question that came up again yesterday. Randomness is the answer that works for me. Not everything is as logical, as controllable, or predictable as we want.

God created the universe and, it seems to me, he turned over the physical aspects of his creation to the created. This hands-off policy means that bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people and we don’t get to put God into some elaborate cause and effect equation.